Life

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Erica Kane is my guru
I'm an English professor who adores great literature, but when I really need guidance, I turn to "All My Children."
15 years ago I said something offensive and now I want to apologize
Something slipped out of my mouth in junior high and it has bothered me all this time. Is it too late?
My family car is an SUB and I love it
On my new "sport utility bicycle" I can cart groceries, take my kids shopping, haul a barbecue grill and make a margarita.
I'm an absent-minded engineer; my mind wanders and so does my wallet
I fear I lack common sense in life, and this affects my performance.
George W. Bush: "Awesome!"
The president has used "awesome" to describe everything from dead soldiers to the pope. How did a slang word trickle up to the highest office in the land?
My friend has gone bad
I hate to lose my best college buddy, but her behavior is beyond the pale.
I was masturbating in my office to kinky Internet porn when another mom walked in
I live in a small, conservative town. I'm petrified about what she may have seen!
Why I hate summer
Sweaty thighs sticking to plastic chairs? Miserable barbecues and forced merriment? Thanks, but I'll pass.
I bailed on taking the bar exam at the last minute -- twice
I finally got through law school but I'm having a problem with procrastination.
I'm afraid I'm doing the wrong art
Should I paint, or sculpt, or write? I can't decide.
The rise and fall of an American beer
Before it was bought by Belgium's InBev, Budweiser trampled local breweries across this land. Who's crying in their (piss) beer now?
When the bottom line overrides the Hippocratic oath
As a naive pediatric resident, I couldn't believe it when the surgeon called back and said we don't treat those kinds of patients.
I'm sleeping with my best friend's fiancé
I didn't like him at first because he was treating her bad, but now I've got him under my skin.
Charles Atlas will make a man of you!
Forget Wii Fit and Perfect Pushup suction cups. To get in shape, I went back to the original fitness guru -- "the world's most perfectly developed man."
My wife left me because the dolphins at Sea World gave me an erection
I thought I could reunify the family with a trip to the aquarium -- but after my mishap, she kicked me out.
Ask Pablo
Follow these simple tips and you can drive your sky-high gasoline bill back down to earth.
Why wouldn't a 16-year-old boy want to live on a houseboat?
See, there's this maverick single dad with three adopted kids, and he buys this old houseboat and starts restoring it ...
A wonderful, magical animal
Tom Colicchio, David Chang and others on the virtues of the hog, the importance of ethical farming and why true pork lovers are not ignorant pigs about their meat.
My company wants me to move to California
I don't like California; I like it where I am!
Bacon is dead! Long live bacon!
It's trendy now, but will hype and gimmickry (bacon cocktails, anyone?) spoil the great salty meat?
I've been passing out drunk and it's getting worse
I can stay sober for a few weeks, but then have another attack. I'm starting to be truly afraid.
My hip-to-waist ratio is nobody's business but mine
Please, women, don't speculate on my hips' suitability for childbearing!
How can I convince my girlfriend that this is as good as it gets?
She's younger, and she's restless, and she wants that spark of the new.
Where have you gone, Marcus Welby?
Family doctors are a dying breed that is not being revived by medical students. This is the healthcare crisis the candidates should be talking about.
Belly of the beast
So why do I cure my own bacon? Because it's fun, it's easy, and loving food is different than loving the food that you make.
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