It's not merely an act of cosmetological genius; Sedaris herself is totally committed to her dream role. "I want to play Angie Dickinson ... I want to do 'Police Woman,'" she says wistfully. "I want to be so beautiful that I'm ugly."

For Sedaris, the urge to transform herself in front of a camera seems too great to overcome. "If someone wanted me to pose in a bikini for the cover of Vanity Fair, I'd make sure I'd have some scars or grow a hairline. To look in the camera and act like you're beautiful is too hard for me." She continues: "Photographers always seem to appreciate when you come in with ideas. I mean, I'll do what they want, but half the time they don't know what they want. So I come and say, 'OK, I got this prosthetic leg, what can we do with it?'"

Sedaris did in fact pose with a prosthetic leg for Index magazine with remarkable results. "That fake leg fit me perfect," she says. "It must have been for a little boy."

With her TV series in summer reruns, Sedaris can return to her other passions: stage work and baking. After a two-year hiatus, she has agreed to write and perform a play once again with her brother, David, the author of popular short story and essay collections such as "Barrel Fever" and "Naked," and a frequently featured commentator on the nationally syndicated radio show "This American Life."

Exactly what their upcoming collaboration will entail is a mystery. "We have no idea what the play's going to be about, what sort of characters it'll feature. Nothing," Sedaris says. The only certainty at this point is that it will be opening in six months.

Judging from their previous stage collaborations, it does promise to be engaging. Earlier Sedaris and Sedaris works, such as "Stitches," centered around the story of a young woman who had her face disfigured by a boat propeller only to eventually star in her own sitcom.

Then there was "One Woman Shoe," where welfare moms had to perform onstage in order to qualify for their benefits. Sedaris adds the following to her risumi: "I've done my little brother before as a donkey in a play at Lincoln Center. I had overalls and had a hat on. It involved animals in the forest and had witches in it."

One constant in each of these productions has been the recurring character best known as Piglet. Like some knocked-up malcontent working the Wendy's drive-through, Piglet is the embodiment of the foulmouthed hardened teen everybody knows and loves. "She's in every play my brother and I do together; we just change her name for each play," Sedaris explains. "You know, you can't do a character like that on TV cause every word is fuckin', fuckers, fuckin', fuck. Every word is a cuss word. Audiences just go nuts over her."

At most of the theater productions she appears in, Sedaris also performs double duty: acting on stage and selling cupcakes in the lobby after the show. She also specializes in cheese balls. "I always sell out of whatever I bring."

Why is she compelled to peddle baked goods after a show? "I just love making money. Cash, you know? It's such a great feeling." Besides, Sedaris adds, "baking is something to do at 3 in the morning. If you're bored, bake."

But the growing popularity of "Strangers With Candy" might just cut into Sedaris' cupcake production. Several notables have expressed interest in doing the show. "Janeane Garofalo wants to do the show again and Winona Ryder has expressed an interest. I've heard that Cher and Tom Waits are big fans of the show, too."

Asked about performers she admires, Sedaris says, "Clint Howard and that guy from 'Boogie Nights' with the big forehead that looks like an ax went through it [John C. Reilly]. They both kinda look like cave dwellers -- Cro-Magnons with big ol' hearts."

Despite its growing cachet among celebrities, the double-barrel bizarre nature of "Strangers With Candy" may never play in the Midwest, but cult status is OK with Sedaris. "It's not a show for everyone," she says.

As for what to expect on "Strangers" next season, it's anyone's guess. Except for one thing. "I want to do a Ben Franklin episode," announces Sedaris. "You know, bring him back from the past. I turned on the TV and saw an episode of 'Bewitched' where they did that. Darren was having some company over and there was Ben Franklin standing in the living room and messing with a lamp. I want Ben Franklin on my show!"

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