They're coming out of the woodwork

Baio boxing pretty-boy Hasselhoff? Hugh Grant challenges Cruise's manliness; Jolie scolds daddy; Russell Crowe and his dirty mind.

By Amy Reiter

Mar 14, 2002 | If the programming geniuses at Fox decide the world really needs another installment of "Celebrity Boxing," Nicole Eggert (remember her?) has a fine idea for a match-up: David Hasselhoff vs. Scott Baio.

The former "Baywatch" and "Charles in Charge" star figures it'd be a suspenseful fight, but suspects that, ultimately, Baio would prevail.

Why? "Because he doesn't care about his appearance. David -- he's primped," she tells Stuff. "Scott's more rugged ... He's not vain."

Which is not to say Baio, an ex-boyfriend of Eggert's, doesnt have his flaws. And she'd apparently like to fill the rest of us in about his biggest fault: "His failure to be faithful."

"Hell tell girls how he wants to settle down and have kids," she gripes, "but in the end he always does the same thing. He never does what he says."

Chachi's a jerk? Someone better warn Joanie.

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Jed, move away from there

"Welll, doggies!"

-- Buddy "Jed Clampett" Ebsen on his most overused phrase, in Vanity Fair.

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Fight, fight, fight, fight ...

Oh, and how 'bout this for another promising "Celebrity Boxing" face-off: Hugh Grant and Tom Cruise.

Grant has already apparently thrown down the gauntlet, calling Cruise "not quite manly" for posing shirtless for Vanity Fair.

Oooooooooh!

"You wouldn't get me posing topless like Tom Cruise on a magazine cover," Grant sniffed to W magazine. "There's something not quite manly about that."

First a man on the moon, and now Hugh Grant teaching us about manliness. Wellll, doggies!

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Gabby grampy

"We are both surprised that Jon Voight decided to announce the baby's arrival before we did."

-- Angelina Jolie and Billy Bob Thornton on Jolie's father's unexpected baby blabbage.

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Stinky speech

Will the poetically challenged Russell Crowe try, try again with the victory verse should he be called upon to accept the best actor award at the Oscars?

If so, he's told the U.K. Sun, he's got the perfect poem in mind, reciting from memory:

"There was a young man from Australia, who painted his a**e like a dahlia. The color was fine, likewise the design, but the aroma, that was a failure."

That'll definitely make it on the air.

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