Right Hook

Speaking of feminism, inevitably there were those who felt an urge to preach some wisdom regarding the female law officer overtaken by Nichols in the Atlanta courthouse. The inimitable Ann Coulter expressed her own notion of faith in "girl cops" on Thursday, in a column titled "Freeze! I just had my nails done!"

"How many people have to die before the country stops humoring feminists? Last week, a defendant in a rape case, Brian Nichols, wrested a gun from a female deputy in an Atlanta courthouse and went on a murderous rampage. Liberals have proffered every possible explanation for this breakdown in security except the giant elephant in the room -- who undoubtedly has an eating disorder and would appreciate a little support vis-`-vis her negative body image.

"The New York Times said the problem was not enough government spending on courthouse security ("Budgets Can Affect Safety Inside Many Courthouses"). Yes, it was tax-cuts-for-the-rich that somehow enabled a 200-pound former linebacker to take a gun from a 5-foot-tall grandmother."

Noting that the recaptured Nichols was later escorted back into court by 17 guards and two police helicopters (which she likened to "P. Diddy showing up for a casual dinner party"), Coulter offered a solution that referenced Larry Summers, whose controversial speech about women in science led one female academic to write that she became physically sick after listening to it.

"I think I have an idea that would save money and lives: Have large men escort violent criminals. Admittedly, this approach would risk another wave of nausea and vomiting by female professors at Harvard. But there are also advantages to not pretending women are as strong as men, such as fewer dead people. Even a female math professor at Harvard should be able to run the numbers on this one."

"Reclaiming America for Christ" -- all of it
Will the ongoing Ashley Smith Revival help religious conservatives stake out even more ground across America's political landscape? It's widely known that evangelicals have several devotees inside the faith-based Bush White House, but according to the Rev. D. James Kennedy, pastor of Coral Ridge Presbyterian Church in Ft. Lauderdale, Fla., there's still a long way to go.

Kennedy outlined the mission of "reclaiming America for Christ" during a national conference at Coral Ridge in February.

"As the vice-regents of God, we are to bring His truth and His will to bear on every sphere of our world and our society," he wrote in a pamphlet handed out to attendees. "We are to exercise godly dominion and influence over our neighborhoods, our schools, our government ... our entertainment media, our news media, our scientific endeavors -- in short, over every aspect and institution of human society."

One conference goer explained the imperative in terms of immigrants living in the United States. "The country is getting further away from Christian values, and we're being stifled," Debbie Mochle-Young of Santa Monica, Calif., told the Christian Science Monitor. "Other nationalities are coming to live here and say, 'We want our beliefs,' but they don't let you have yours."

Richard Land of the Southern Baptist Convention, who spoke at the gathering, expanded on the need for a wholesale religious takeover.

"We have God-sized problems in our country," he said, "and only God can solve them."

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