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Monday, Nov 9, 2009
"I'm not insensitive to the agonies of mental illness, but I was tremendously disturbed by this display of self-justifying narcissism." Salon readers sound off on Ayelet Waldman's debut column.
Mar 18, 2005 | [Read "Living Out Loud -- Online" by Ayelet Waldman.]
As one of the avid readers of Ayelet Waldman's blog -- and a blogger myself -- I have to say that Ayelet grossly underestimates her skill as a writer when she says that her readers did not know what she was saying when she penned her online suicide note. It was very clear what that post was, at least to me. Maybe it was because I know so much about bipolar disorder. (My father is bipolar, and I recently wrote a book on the subject.) But I doubt that. I think it was because her post was honest and raw and heartbreaking, and her words so real and palpably pained that there was no other way to interpret them. I held my breath waiting for her next post, just to make sure she was OK. I knew precisely what was at stake for her and her family. And as much as I miss hearing her voice each day in that inimitably personal way, I'm glad to know that there are now other ways I can see how she is doing. Because she became part of my life in those two short months, and I would worry about her if I couldn't check in with her every now and again.
-- Lori Oliwenstein
I'd like to believe I'm not insensitive to the agonies of mental illness, but I was tremendously disturbed by the display of self-justifying narcissism which was "Living Out Loud -- Online." I don't know what it would take for the author to acquire a healthy sense of boundaries, but I do know that airing your dysfunctions in public to such a degree that your 7-year-old child is traumatized and fearful for the life of his mother is an inexcusable act of child abuse. God help these poor children as they get older and find their adolescent growing pains and struggles broadcast over the Internet by their mother, who apparently believes that their lives are ultimately all about her.
A diagnosis of bipolar disorder should not be license to damage your loved ones by publishing your tortured navel-gazing for all the world to see.
-- Mark L.
I often struggle with the same issues Ayelet Waldman mentions in her column. I don't worry so much about family members reading about my personal revelations, but more about clients, especially when many of my rantings are about my fears and insecurities about my work, my self, even my work ethic. In my client relationships, I hope to always have the opportunity to put my best foot forward. It seems somehow wrong for clients to see what it takes from me mentally to get to that point.
On the other hand, if I were more open about my processes and fears, wouldn't that lead to my clients' opening up and eventually to something that might actually help organizations in trouble: transparency?
-- Lisa Sulgit
