"Mom, what are asses of evil?"

Protesters have taken over my Manhattan neighborhood. But how do I explain their signs -- let alone the dismal state of the world -- to my 9-year-old son?

By Ellen Neuborne

Sep 2, 2004 | I expected the Republican National Convention to provide some teachable moments for my 9-year-old son -- especially since we live in Greenwich Village in downtown Manhattan. But I didn't anticipate that it would teach him some new words.

Earlier this week in Union Square -- ground zero for many of the protest groups -- I stopped to buy a T-shirt that depicted President Bush, Vice President Cheney and Donald Rumsfeld. The caption read "Axis of Evil."

"Do you want 'Axis of Evil' or 'Asses of Evil'? We have both," the young vendor asked as I handed her my $10, gesturing to the two options. My son began to giggle. "I'll take the Axis," I muttered, hurrying him away. He chuckled for blocks.

It wasn't the first time since the RNC's arrival that my desire to raise a good liberal Democrat has run smack into my desire to raise a well-spoken gentleman. On the morning of the big pre-convention protest, I took my son and 5-year-old daughter to the playground at Washington Square Park early, hoping to get some ya-yas out before things got hectic in the streets. Washington Square has also served as a popular staging ground and meeting place for all manner of demonstrators: We saw the hookup spot for Texans Against Bush, Teachers for Peace and the Road Runners Club, among others. What did they all have in common? Signs. And my son read all of them with escalating glee.

"No more Bush-Shit!"

"Lick Bush!"

"Bush Sucks!"

"Don't say 'sucks.'"

"I'm not saying. I'm reading."

"I don't want to hear the word 'sucks' coming from you."

"Mom, everyone here is saying it."

"If everyone here jumped off the Brooklyn Bridge, would you?"

"Huh? What are you talking about?"

(Yeah, that Brooklyn Bridge thing always seemed like a non sequitur to me, too.)

I've been wearing my Kerry button all week; I'm proud New York is standing up and talking back. But it's a shock to my liberal core to find my parental impulses at odds with my political ones.

Take the nude activists who walked out onto Eighth Avenue and bared all to call attention to the criminal lack of funding for AIDS treatment around the world: There wasn't nearly enough pixilation to disguise them on the 5 o'clock news.

"Mom, what would you do if I went out in the street and took off all my clothes?" my son asked.

Again, I faced the dilemma: Who should answer that question? Politically Aware Mom or Behave Yourself Mom? I want him to be resolute in his convictions, willing to stand up and do what's necessary to speak the truth or right a wrong. On the other hand, the notion of my boy on the news wearing nothing but plastic handcuffs makes my stomach drop. I wavered and went for the blended response.

"Of course I expect you to wear your clothes in public. But this is not about taking off all your clothes. They're trying to make a point. They're doing something that they know everybody will look at so that they can be sure people are listening to their message."

"I'll bet their moms are mad," he said.

I'll bet their moms have mixed feelings about the whole thing.

Next Page: My neighbor says I should take my kids into the streets, into the protests

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