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Tuesday, Oct 7, 2008
"All we had was prayer. And I did a lot of that."
Nov 11, 1999 | The U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs knows exactly how many men served in Vietnam (2,594,200) and how many were killed in action (58,188). It can furnish all kinds of stats about those soldiers, like the percentage of men who worked in supply (between 60 and 70 percent) as opposed to combat (30 to 40 percent). But ask about the women who served in Vietnam -- women other than nurses -- and the numbers disappear. The records are muddled, they say; the files don't work that way. Yes, the armed forces sent women to Vietnam, but an official record of their presence there doesn't really exist.
At least 1,200 female soldiers were stationed in Vietnam in various branches of the military as photojournalists, clerks, typists, intelligence officers, translators, flight controllers, even band leaders. They served prominently in Saigon, in the Mekong Delta and at Long Binh, which was, for a time, the largest Army headquarters in the world.
They could not fight, nor were they allowed to carry weapons to defend themselves. Most were part of the pioneering Women's Army Corps (WAC), created in 1942 to integrate the armed forces. All of them enlisted for service in Vietnam, mostly in the early part of the war.
Like a lot of Vietnam veterans, these women have been dogged by their experiences in country; unlike many veterans, they do not feel officially recognized and have been reluctant to seek help. Some have been plagued by symptoms of post-
"For eight years, my husband didn't know I was a vet," says Agnes Feak, who participated in an air evacuation of Amerasian children called Operation Baby Lift. "I kept my mouth shut when I came home. He found a photo of me in fatigues and said, 'Who's that?' And I said, 'That's me.'"
Linda Watson, who was a private first class, says, "I didn't think I qualified for benefits, because I didn't consider myself a Vietnam vet. It's just recently I came to the realization I am. I didn't see all the atrocities. But I saw enough for me."
This week, the WAC women who served in Vietnam are having their first reunion, a three-day "homecoming" in Olympia, Wash. For some of them, it will be the first time they have talked about the war. Some won't go, because they still can't.
"I'm looking forward to [the reunion] with trepidation," says Karen Offutt, who served as an administrator in Vietnam. "I don't know what memories will come out. On the other hand, I'm hoping that it will put closure to it.
"People keep saying, Why don't you forget Vietnam? I don't think I'll forget Vietnam, because it changed my trust in people -- it isolated me. I seem like a very sociable person. But I'm very much a recluse. It just changed me. The babies that I took care of -- babies with their legs blown off and shrapnel wounds, I felt so helpless and the guilt of having seen what I had.
"I'd like to forget about it, but I think about it every day."
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[Editor's note: Reporter Austin Bunn conducted dozens of interviews with WAC veterans of Vietnam for Salon Mothers Who Think. Their memories and reflections follow.]
+ ARRIVAL IN VIETNAM
Name: Marion C. Crawford
In country: Tan Son Nuht, Long Binh, October 1966 to June 1968
Rank: First sergeant, in charge of all enlisted personnel (works with commander)
Age in Vietnam: 36
Current age: 69
Current home: Eustis, Fla.
When I first got there, it was like nothing I had ever experienced. The minute the plane went nosing into the airport in Tan Son Nhut -- they have to come in at such a steep angle because of ground fire -- we were hanging on by our toenails. It was a real quick landing with a jerk stop.
When you got out of the plane, it was all guys with heavy weapons walking around. And, of course, I was a novelty being a female soldier with a diamond [for sergeant] on my arm. All the guys looked at me and said, "She's got a diamond, that means there are women coming!" And they all kept yelling at me, "When are the women coming? When are the women coming?" I laughed.
That's one of the reasons why there was a fence around the WAC detachment, because there were 50,000 guys and I was getting in 109 women.
Name: Karen Offutt
In country: Long Binh, Saigon, July 1969 to June 1970
Rank: E5
Age in Vietnam: 19
Job: Stenographer, office of the chief of staff
Current age: 50
Current home: Wesley Chapel, Fla.
I didn't have a clue about where Southeast Asia was. When I got off the plane, these guys were cheering and I thought they were cheering for us. But then I looked at them and I realized they were cheering because they were getting to leave. They looked just so old. It was depressing.
They put me on this bus and I thought I was going to Saigon, but I went to Long Binh [Army headquarters]. On the bus, there was chicken wire on the window and I asked the guy next to me and he mumbled something. And I said, "What's that?" And he said it was to deflect the grenades. And I just thought, Oh, my God. I looked back at the plane to see if I could get back on it.
My first night they started hitting us with mortar rounds. The whole building shook. It was a horrible night. I just laid there. I was paralyzed. And I figured I wasn't going to make it out. There were four or five of us in the room. And they were saying don't worry about it -- the Vietnamese are bad shots. I thought, Yeah, right.
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