Have you been designing at all?

Of course. I mean, I haven't stopped. I came up with a collection about two weeks after I won, and then I was sitting on that forever. It's been hard, because a lot of people in the industry don't want to invest time or energy or money because it's like, "You were on a TV show." But the flip side, it is like a résumé, and I'm not the most motivated person, where I'm out there at Marquis and Air every night being like, "Yeah, I'm Jay McCarroll, and here's my card!" I wait for people to kind of fall into my lap, or to come across someone who knows someone, and that takes time. Putting a business together takes tons of time. I saw Heidi [Klum] at some kind of party, and she's like, "Why aren't you doing anything? Why aren't you doing more?" and, "When I was young, I went everywhere, and I did everything!" And I was like, "Well, I'm trying to set up a business with distribution and manufacturing and production and licensing and marketing, and you just show up at a photo shoot and collect a check."

And viewers of the show don't understand that I can't make 5,000 tote bags by myself and I can't whip up a wedding dress in a day and a half like I did on the show. I mean, those things were stapled on, sewn on, barely hanging on. It would be easy for me to do a fashion show straightaway. I could put together an entire collection, but how does that get to the customer? I can't mass-manufacture that stuff when I have no money. I can't distribute that stuff when there's only one of them. There are a lot of factors that go into a fashion business that a lot of people who watch the show, people who were executives on the show and came up with ideas for the show, don't understand. I mean, that's why so many fashion businesses fail, because there's so much overhead, and getting investors and proving yourself and putting out collections on your own and seeing how your sales numbers are and how your financials are. There's a lot to it.

There is a glossy façade to "Project Runway" work. "Here's your challenge to design something inspired by the pork industry! Da da da!" And the music is on and it's all glistening and the pigs are oinking, and the pigs are slaughtered, and you're making beautiful leather jackets out of it, but the zipper doesn't work and it smells like fucking kung pao chicken. It's glossy, but the reality of it is, this stuff takes years, and it's going to take me years to do this stuff. But hopefully people will remember my big Sasquatch face enough to buy the clothes.

I'm working on a line right now. It's going to show in September. There's interest, but there's still no money and I need a glob of money to make this happen the way I want it to happen. I can put out 30 T-shirts, but I want more than that. And now "Project Runway" is being shown in Norway and China, and it's like, I get to now think about international markets? That's great. The best thing that came out of "Project Runway" is the fact that they sold my soul to this planet. They're all potential customers, so I'm not offended by that.

So your target market is a mass market, not a couture kind of thing?

Right. I want complete accessibility -- affordability, most importantly. Because that's how I shop, that's how my friends shop, that's how my family shops. I don't know anyone who wears Fendi fur, and those people are disgusting to me. I don't want that to be my market. I want those happy girls who are putting themselves through college working two jobs. I want those people who are young professionals who are just trying to make ends meet and living their dream. I don't want those fucking bitches whose husbands pay for them to wear my clothes. I don't want that! I don't care about red-carpet stuff. I don't care about celebrity. We're in a really important time in fashion right now with the disposability of clothes. The Old Navys of the world -- I love Old Navy, I love Wal-Mart -- they pump this shit out. I don't know how it's being made, and I buy it for nine dollars.

Has your view of the world gotten darker since you did "Project Runway"?

It's actually gotten lighter. Because once you know these things, then you can make conscious changes in your world. Ideally, if I could use organic fibers and no fur and no leather and no slave labor and organic dyes in my line, and have it produced stateside, that's my only goal. And I'll work with organic cosmetic companies and no companies that do animal testing. The way so many companies work is so disgusting. But the more I learn about that, that's more leverage that I have. I'm an animal lover, I'm an earth lover, I'm a recycler, I'm a composter. If I can bring beauty to the world in that way ... I'm going to be the "Super Size Me" of the fashion world, basically.

Do you think you can still make your clothes affordable?

Oh, hell, yeah. People are great with consciousness. If it costs 10 dollars more -- I don't want to market to those people who don't care. I have this one friend in particular who wants a fur coat, for no reason -- it just looks pretty. And me being Sasquatch and not growing up as Brad Pitt, I've been really conscious of not being pretty in my life ... For me, my friends and family will get the first [design] of everything, always. I'll give it to fucking strangers. I'll send you shit.

In that case, send me that skirt with the circles on it, and the scarf that goes with it. That's what I want. Do you think anyone sabotaged their career by bombing on the show?

No, we're all pretty much lost right now. It'll take time. We'll see in the next year or two people starting to reemerge again. We've all been just sitting on ideas and plans.

So, it sounds like you need a lot of time and money to do things your way.

Well, I need a lot of money, and $100,000 sounds great but I didn't take the money. I basically opted to pursue other financial avenues.

What? Were there strings attached?

I can't talk about it.

That sounds like a serious injustice!

It's fine. It's been a challenge to work around that obstacle, and if I can make it work beyond that, then I've really worked...

I could've been a complete douche bag right now, I could've been like, "Yeah, you know it's really funny, it's great to talk to you, Heather!" I've been media-trained! I'd probably say, "The best part of 'Project Runway' is all the parties! I mean, I've met so many great people!" That's not interesting. That's what Nick Lachey is for and that's what Lindsay Lohan's for. I'm not that person.

Do you think your thoughtfulness can get in your way?

No. I mean, there's a game to be played, but we're in really crazy times right now with Hollywood and the media. Fucking Giuliana DePandi on E! news: "Breaking news! We're interrupting 'Gastineau Girls' to tell you about Nick and Jessica's big breakup!" People are getting sick of that, and people are going to want to start to strip things down.

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