Do you worry, when your schedule gets too intense, that you'll lose touch with that aspect of your life?

I haven't been as close to everyone [lately] as I have been, and that's kind of sad. But those people are the closest, that's family to me, so we catch up pretty quickly when we do see each other. I worry about it, but I've been in it long enough now that no one's going anywhere. I have a project, "Sympathy for Delicious," that I want to direct that was written by Chris Thornton, who's part of this group, and I'm gonna do a play with another writer who's part of the group.

When you got sick after "You Can Count on Me," how did your perspective change?

I don't know. That was a real blessing in disguise. But I've talked so much about it... [Laughs.] I'd rather not talk about it. All you need to know is, I'm great now!

"We Don't Live Here Anymore"

Directed by John Curran

Starring Mark Ruffalo, Laura Dern, Peter Krause, Naomi Watts

OK. I can just link to one of the other interviews where you talk about it.

Yeah, do a link! You can have a long list of links. I've talked a lot about that before. But the overall thing was: Live your life fully and make sure it's your life at the end of it. Don't look back and think, "Oh, I lived my mom's life" or "I lived my agent's life" or "I lived my wife's life." It's never as crisp as the first realization, but it's pretty much woven into who I am now.

So it's something that you don't have to remember to do.

No, it's so galvanizing, and there's so much heat created from it, it sort of re-tempers your whole soul. I used to worry, like, "Will I forget to take this experience with me?" And my friends would say, "You're forever changed. There's no turning back."

That's good, though. Do you see other people and think, "Man, all that guy needs is a hard kick to the groin..."

Yeah, those people, you think, "In 10 years, you'll know." Maybe they're young, they just haven't been through anything yet.

And it's kind of a shame, because before you go through some things, it's tough to appreciate what you have.

That's true. But I didn't either, so I can't blame them. It's hard to get it. You don't really understand it until it happens.

Do you have a strategy for choosing a mix of small and big roles?

Yeah, I mean, I pretty much go where the roles go. There's kind of criteria: First is the role, next would be the overall piece, and then people I get to work with, and then money. But I've been able to sort of step easily between bigger films and smaller films. And I feel like I haven't compromised anything by doing it. I just ask myself, "Have I done this character? Would it be fun to do? Is it speaking to some part of me at this time in my life?" I often find that the really great roles are in smaller pieces.

Recent Stories