LB: And that explains your political affiliations! You guys are just a bunch of mopes, y'all are all just sorrowful types who haven't figured out which sock drawer you oughta shove all your personal misery and disappointment and, and guilt in. It's like a mental condition is what it is.

TK: Don't you sort of think all politics is connected to psychological, um, baggage, um, stuff? See, that's why I think your art-isn't-political line is sort of, well, a meaningless distinction.

LB: [Overlapping on "um, stuff?"] I mean it's not like there's anyone who isn't sorrowful or guilty, it's just some people don't fall back on that as the basis of a whole droopy dreary you know, Weltanshauung, pardon my French -- and I know, skipper, you don't think people from East Texas know big German words like Weltanshauung, but we do. You're a snob, is another thing. And by the way Scalia's son isn't named Rusty -- where on earth did you get that? don't you check any facts? -- his name's Eugene.

TK: Maybe all liberalism and progressivism and left-leaning politics are pathological, but I would argue less maladaptive and delusional than, say, well, your politics, or rather your husband's -- since no one knows what yours really are, which is why I find you so fascinating, it's...

LB: Oh, you know what mine are, don't be so friggin' fascinated, you snoop. Mine are just a whole lot like his are, maybe not so, not so, well that's none of your business.

TK: But like I think all conservative thought is sort of a product of thought disorder, like a mild thought disorder, an inability to follow an idea or an action through to its actual consequences, or, or it's a morbid obsessional terror and the sourness and viciousness that accompanies such...

LB: What I think is you people are afraid of my husband, is what I think...

TK: Oh, no argument about that, I mean...

LB: [Overlapping, continuous from above.] You're afraid of George because, because well, first off you hate him because he does things. I mean actually likely to act, to act on his convictions. It's not his convictions -- it's that he does stuff about it.

TK: Well, no, it's that he does stuff about it and also his convictions really suck, his ideological...

LB: You all can't stand his, well, let's call it vividness. "Ideological." Balls! Oh, sure, he's not a reader, I mean tell me about it! Sure, he can't get through the ingredients on the side panel of the cereal box in the morning without moving his lips, and sure, for people who read, for some people who read, this is like, well, the mark of the devil because such people as yourself are snobs and you wear your reading like an expensive suit and you don't want to talk to people who just could give a flyin' flip about such things and who think "You wear your suit, and I wear my suit which I bought at Wal-Mart and so what, so what?"

TK: But you people are like beyond rich. You don't shop at Wal-Mart, you may eat pork rinds but you own the ranch!! You own the whole - And you're hardly uninterested in what other people are wearing, I mean you snoop and you pry and you try to get librarians to sign loyalty oaths and this whole laissez-faire --

LB: [Overlapping on "you snoop, etc."] But for people like you it's a precious badge of distinction notifying all other suit wearers, "Look at me, I have read enough to be muddleheaded enough not to do a frigging thing!" I mean, look at that gloomy old banana face you just nominated, and sorry to be name-calling but really, take a good look! Does anyone think he's likely to do anything other than marvel at the complexity of everything and hire people who are similarly awestruck and flabbergasted at the, at the whole magical mystery tour incomprehensibility of it all, and so you'll, you'll all get together in Washington like last time and you'll, you'll what, you'll ban snowmobiles in Yellowstone Park and then everyone in the Sierra Club'll take everyone in PETA out for a Sunday night pizza!

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