King Kaufman's Sports Daily

Shaq goes to the Heat. Just another old guy retiring to South Florida?

July 15, 2004 | I'm glad Shaquille O'Neal isn't a Laker anymore. Now we can reason together over the next few years, discussing what promises to be his fascinating decline phase, without all that emotional baggage that comes with talking about the Lakers.

The Big Downhill was traded to the Heat Wednesday, as expected, for Lamar Odom, Brian Grant, Caron Butler and a draft pick. The Heat are proclaiming the trade a steal because they didn't have to give up an All-Star. That's like me proclaiming my recent purchase of a '78 Vega a steal because I didn't have to give up any of my Fabergé eggs.

I don't mean to suggest that Shaq is a '78 Vega. He's totally a Monza. Much respect.

Actually, I just wanted to type the word "Monza." What he is is an old Caddy, big and beautiful and iconic and starting to show its miles. He can absolutely still dominate a game, even a playoff series, but he's 32, he'll be 33 before the next playoffs start, and he's not ever going to be the Shaquille O'Neal of the turn of the century again.

And when I say he can dominate a playoff series, I don't mean the NBA Finals, which lack the copious days off of the earlier rounds, days off that Shaq badly needs. His recent poor playoff performances on fewer than two days' rest are well documented.

Now you'll hear a lot of talk, maybe some of it from the Big Motivated himself, that now that Shaq is out of the L.A. soap opera, now that he's not busy squabbling with Kobe Bryant and getting blamed for everything that goes wrong in Staples blue and gold, he'll whip himself into shape and, galvanized by his new surroundings, playing in his home state, supported by teammates who appreciate him, he'll once again be the Big Diesel, able to put a team on his back and carry it for a whole season, and maybe even longer, perhaps long enough to read this sentence.

Well guess what. Even if the Big Gotta Have a Whopper does whip himself into fighting trim again -- and I'm not betting any of my Fabergé eggs on that one -- he's going to be in for a surprise. He'll look fabulous, all cut muscles and agile dominance. But when picture day is over and it's time to get on the court for real, he's going to find that things won't have improved much.

Next page: The decline of an NBA big-man is a one-way deal. Plus: What's this mean for the Lakers?